Question 3

I am behind, but whatever. See my previous post!

The third question is:

Do you know where you are on your journey?

I feel like I am a lot more on track with my inner journey than I am with the part of my life people see. Ya know, the part that we judge in our western society. When it came to knowing I was ready to be a mom, it was more about how I deal with stress, anger, and difficult decisions than it was about a partner, a job, and money. Those things are all good to have but I tend to do them backwards.

On my inner journey, my spiritual and emotional one, I am due for a step back and a good hard look. That is really challenging because I have no alone time to devote to myself. I feel like I need to do some of this work before I am ready for my big picture life goals of a relationship and becoming an IBCLC.

Obviously I can’t force a relationship to happen but I think I have been doing them all wrong in the past. I am not a very outwardly nice person in the way of compliments and kind words. I also tend to bail instead of sticking it out and being patient when the other person is struggling. I want to work on thus but don’t know how.

In order to be successful in completing the IBCLC classes, hours, and test, I will have to work through my fear of failure about school. I have been detailed at every attempt to complete some kind of education. Even high school, I have my GED, and I think that is where it is all rooted. I feel like this is attainable but will take a lot of work (and money).

As for where exactly I am in all of this, if I don’t know where my life ends, then how can a gauge my distance from it?

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About JennP

Single mom by choice, lesbian, natural living, parenting, car free, Chicago.Thank you for reading and feel free to leave a comment!
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