MicroBlog Monday: Get Me Out of Here!

Weaning brought about an overwhelming wave of depression, the likes of which I haven’t seen since being rejected by both my parents when I came out. It made me realize how badly I need to get out of here. I need to not be living with my dad anymore. I am looking into moving out and living on student loans and my meager income.

First, I started looking at cheap apartments near here so I could finish up the classes I need to get done before PSU. Then, A asked me why not just move to Portland instead of waiting until my classes are done. I could move while still taking my online classes here, get set up there to take my last two classes in the spring and summer, and get residency so PSU will be in state tuition.

I think it sounds brilliant and I would love to be moved by March at the latest. Now just to make it all work!

(And this, folks, is my 500th post!)

About JennP

Single mom by choice, lesbian, natural living, parenting, car free, Chicago.Thank you for reading and feel free to leave a comment!
This entry was posted in background, breastfeeding, family, Microblog Monday, Parenting, Single Mother by Choice - SMC and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

16 Responses to MicroBlog Monday: Get Me Out of Here!

  1. Lindsay says:

    Maybe part of your depression is being somewhere where you’re not happy, and the hormones make it feel that much more intense. I think A’s idea is a great one – get out as early as you can. Your mental health is worth it! What steps do you have to take between now and March to make it happen? How will you rent a place – find it on CL? That’s how we/I found a place when we first moved to Toronto. Just found a place on CL and sent the money, etc..It can be done!

  2. Yea, being someplace I am not wanted, not spoken to, not treated with respect is a big part of it and weaning emotions magnified it. It is very different here than the first time. I need to secure loans (probably federal and private), make sure PCC or PSU have the classes I need to take, for real have my court date in Chicago in January, find a place to live, and figure out the logistics of the move. I also will need to buy a computer as mine is 10 years old and barely functioning. A printer would be nice too but not a necessity for online and hybrid courses. Even in person ones I could print via USB at the school. I am looking on craigslist as well as posting in Portland parenting groups (SMC, queer, crunchy). It would be lovely to find someone who would like to do a cohousing situation and I am starting a conversation with a possibility. Okay, someone is telling me it is time to get dressed.

  3. Lindsay says:

    It would be really awesome if you could find a roommate from one of the SMC/crunchy parent groups!

  4. I posted an intro in the groups and have a queer smc who says she wants to talk! She has a 2yo and is living in a studio. Her name starts with J and her daughter’s with a W…

  5. I’ve got a friend trying to convince me to buy a motorhome and live in that.

  6. Traci York says:

    I well remember the post-weaning depression. I was hit especially hard after weaning our youngest, for a myriad of reasons. Sending good thoughts your way.

    Back in 2010, our family of five (plus a dog and a cat) lived in a 30 foot camper for about a year. I didn’t blog as much as I planned about it, but I do have a handful of entries up (http://www.traciyork.com/tag/camper-living/), if you’re interested. Also, I’d be happy to answer any questions you have – it could possibly be the solution you’re looking for. Best of luck, in any case!

  7. Thank you for your comment and positive thoughts! How long did your depression last? I am really hoping I don’t have another bout of it as I was having suicidal thoughts.

    I will check out your blog! I have a ton of questions and thoughts about this possibility. I am getting a lot of information from my friend. I don’t know how she does it with 3 kids. How did it work with a cat? I have one and she is a prolific pee-er, though is great with the litterbox. Email me? Goodfamiliesdo at gmail.

  8. Traci York says:

    My post weaning depression was complicated by postpartum depression, dysthymia, and generalized anxiety disorder, so it took a couple of years of medication and counseling to get back to “normal.” However, knowing what I know now, I also had undiagnosed deficiencies in Iron and Vitamin D that held back my recovery. And I’m sure this isn’t news to you, but should the suicidal thoughts return in any form, please reach out to someone immediately. *hugs*

    Oh, and I’d be happy to shoot you an email – look for admin at traciyork dot com in your inbox soon. 🙂

  9. I sent messages to two friends right when I realized what was going on. I also considered a safe medical professional to call, the hosptial midwife I had. I am doing better after a horrible few days. Weaning means that I can take the Chinese herbs for anger/liver and that has me feeling like a decent person again. They have mint so it is also helping decrease my milk the rest of the way.

  10. Traci York says:

    Excellent! I’m so glad you have such a good handle on this. And since I forgot to say this in my first reply, congratulations on post #500!

  11. Thanks! I cant believe it’s been over 4 years! I have consistency and long term commitment issues.

  12. I’m working through some of your posts now but I need to go make lunch and call a school in Portland then get us packed up for work that could get canceled as we need to walk out the door… ah life!

  13. Sounds like the start of a great plan. It is so hard to make big changes, even when you know that you need to. But worth it!
    I hope your depression clears up soon. It is good that you are able to recognize it and talk about it.

  14. Sarah says:

    As I said before, weaning is hard enough when you’re ready! I’m so sorry you’re dealing with the emotional aftermath – that oxytocin makes all the difference. I’ve struggled with anger off and on and went thru a month or too of mild depression. As another commenter said, it sounds like you’re very aware and educated about yourself and what works. I’m glad you reached out to some friends!

    I’m a big fan of you getting out of there, to somewhere more supportive, asap! And having that plan to focus on and look forward to can make such a difference, in and of itself.
    I’ve never applied to schools, so idk for sure, but I would double check what’s required to be considered a resident for the purposes of in-state tuition. A friend found out that in AZ they had to live there for two years before they could qualify, regardless of everything else, and that negatively impacted their ability to stay there. Not to discourage you in any way, bc I think Portland is the way to go, (no more than I know…) but just to prepare. If you haven’t already thought of it!

    Congratulations on your 500th post!!

  15. Mel says:

    Congratulations on the milestone post AND having a plan in place to work toward.

  16. I always have a plan! It just rarely works as I imagined, hahaha!

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