Honestly, kids are the best. They’ve got the right idea of how to move through the world if we let them lead the way. (And maybe we can learn something from them.)
Take playgrounds, for example.
They individually go there, either by choice or coercion, but with the same idea and purpose in mind. Kids know that the point of playgrounds is to have fun and play until they are told it’s time to leave. They know that each kid is also there to have fun.
Kids don’t need to pretend like they are okay playing on their own or sitting and watching other kids. They don’t need to know someone in order to feel comfortable playing. A kid can walk up to another kid and just start playing with them. Either making up a game together or joining in a game in progress, it doesn’t matter and the play is fluid and ever changing.
I’m writing this from a park bench as I sort of listen to my kid play with two others. My kid brought a bag with some action figures and a harmonica to the park today. The interaction began by a little girl making a bee line for my kid as soon as we got there. She followed them up the play structure and said,
My name’s Elaine. What’s yours?”
That’s all it takes to make friends. Whether it’s for 15 minutes or 10 years.
Then a younger boy walked up to them and said,
Can I play with you?
The three of them began to play and a few minutes later, Elaine was called by her mom and was gone. It was a fleeting friendship, but kids know that’s how playground friends work. They might see each other again, but who knows.
Meanwhile, I’m on a bench, but not the same bench as the parents of the little boy. The mom went and got some chalk and is drawing something on the path. Part of me wants to walk over to see what she is drawing. Part of me wants to ask,
My name’s Jenn. Can I draw with you?
(Don’t worry, the kids went to draw with her and she’s making an octopus. I’ve got a book to read while I sit in the sun.)
Good Families Do... 